


that one episode with the salamanders

by singingwasps



Category: The Flash (TV 2014)
Genre: Gen, in between seasons, just two characters talking about star trek for like 900 words, lena and kara are endgame don't @ me
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-12-28
Updated: 2018-12-28
Packaged: 2019-09-29 13:10:21
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 934
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/17204003
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/singingwasps/pseuds/singingwasps
Summary: Cisco and Wells have a Discussion™ on doppelgängers and pop culture.





	that one episode with the salamanders

“So you’ve met Snapper Carr, right,” Cisco asks, because it’s Tuesday, and that means it’s time for him to make references that Wells cannot, in any capacity, understand or parse.

 “I’m almost entirely sure I haven’t but I’m equally sure you’re going to tell me about him,” he replies flatly.

 “Ok, so he’s like, Kara’s boss, or maybe he’s not, but like sort of her mini boss? Like how you’re my boss, and then Caitlin is the boss boss, even _in_ _absentia-_ ”

 “Oh my god,” he mutters.

 “And then there’s Barry? Except Barry doesn’t take a leadership position, of course. Anyway, Kara sorta works for him-”

 “Who’s Kara again?”

 “You know Kara,” he exclaims. “Supergirl! Cute! Dating Lena Luthor.”

 Harrison Wells, formerly of Earth-2 gives him the most withering blink he can manage. “I don’t know who Lena Luthor is either.”

 Cisco makes a vague hand gesture, “Anyway, you think he looks like Doctor from _Voyager_?”

 “From...what?”

 “You’ve never seen _Star Trek_ ,” Cisco says, like Wells has just admitted he watches the Superbowl for the ads.

 “I don’t know what a _Star Trek_ is.”

 “How do you not know what _Star Trek_ is, you’re the most _Star Trek_ person i’ve ever met.”

 “Is it a tv show?”

 Defensively, Cisco corrects with, “there’s also books.”

 “Is this the one with the unrealistic laser swords.”

 A primal groan gets ripped out of Cisco’s throat, “Oh my God, please don’t explain to me how a movie about wizards has dodgy science, man. We get it. You have a phd.”

 “I have seven.”

 “Also like, they’re more like laser chainsaws man, did you or did you not read the wiki article i sent you.”

 Wells, who has, in fact, read every wiki article Cisco has ever sent him, says “no. Why would I?”

 “Whatever dude,” he rolls his eyes. “Anyway, how have you not seen any _Star Trek_? Do you not have it on your earth?”

 “I don’t watch a lot of tv,” Wells idles with arbitrarily turning some knobs because at this point he’s read the same paragraph of analysis for the fifth time trying to get through this conversation. Sometimes it’s better this way. No one has been accurately able to really figure out what he does, with the exception of Caitlin, who he suspects knows exactly what he does and when he’s just arbitrarily fiddling with knobs. Caitlin knows just about everything, but she’s also not here right now to, as Cisco would put it ‘be a narc about it’.

 Wells does, in fact, watch a lot of tv but it’s mostly depression induced marathons of How it’s Made where he tries to analyze the chemical makeup of secret proprietary recipes. Like everyone does. Once he caught an episode of a sitcom about people who don’t have jobs and spend a lot of time arguing in a bar about the jobs they show no evidence of having. And then another episode of one where they seemed to have completely non-interfering occupations, but according to Jessie, the two shows were completely different.

 “I figured you would’ve at least hate watched it.”

 “I don’t hate watch things.”

 “Yeah man, you just leave weirdly specific goodread reviews on the author pages.”

 “His metaphors were sloppy,” he offers mildly, not entirely sure which particular review Cisco refers to. After all, Jessie told him to get a hobby, and the only thing that really works is letting other people know they’re wrong. Perhaps this is why he doesn’t get invited to bar trivia nights anymore, despite the fact that they had a 0 losses record.

 “Ok we’re doing this, Harrison, we’re taking a buzzfeed quiz on what _Star Trek_ character you are so we can start you off right.”

 “Chronologically would be best.”

 Cisco makes a face, “we’re not watching _Enterprise_. I’m not exposing you to that one first. We need a machete order to make that one work.”

 The quiz is trivial, as he’d thought it would be. Lost of bright colors and pictures, as if he can’t pay attention for more than five minutes. It’s also written by someone named Nathaniel Heywood, which vaguely strikes him as being familiar, but not enough. A blank egg with hair comes to mind when he sees the name, but no distinctive features. Eventually, the quiz comes to a head as he gets the result.

 “Sisko,” Cisco exclaims. “You got Sisko?”

 Wells gives him a measured, patient look.

 “I mean. I don’t know. You always struck me more as, I don’t know. Odo. Or the Doctor?”

 “The one that looks like the man I’ve never met.”

 “Dude they could be twins, I’m telling you,” Cisco pulls up his phone and shows him a picture of the Supposed Doctor.

 He doesn’t even look at the screen, but Cisco shoves it inches away from his face, until he replies. “I don’t know who this is. Isn’t the Doctor who you think the sloppy time traveler who leaves Barry voicemails is?”

 “Oh man, ok different Doctor and no- that’s. Ok How have you not engaged with any pop culture?”

 “Pop culture was banned on my earth.”

 “No it wasn’t. You know what _Jurassic Park_ is!”  

 “It was Jessie’s favorite movie when she was a little girl,” he offers. “Of course I know what it is. A documentary on the life forms of the Jurassic period. Allosaurs, no t-rexes.”

 “The whole _conceit_ of the movie is that it’s an artificial theme park, you _cannot_ be this pedantic, anyway, we’re watching _Deep Space Nine_. I’m gonna have to ease you into the ultimate in human evolution.” 


End file.
